Something I have tried to avoid. I went through my breastfeeding nazi phase, and believe me I still think that breast is best, but being a working mom and providing 100% of the breast milk needed for M2 was becoming a challenge. I worked my ass off and cried many tears getting through those first few month of the breastfeeding learning curve. It was kind of like a runners high, once I hit that point where it was much easier I felt like it was worth it and I could continue on. I got to a point where I began to actually enjoy breastfeeding. I could lean back, relax, and connect with my adorable baby girl. It's true what they say about breastfeeding releasing endorphins, I started feeling at ease and calm while breastfeeding.
Basically the thing is I hate pumping. HATE. Whenever I say the word "hate" Mr.P always says, "Don't be a hater!" Well, I am a hater. I have busted my ass pumping. On an average day, I spend upwards of 2 hours pumping, and another 30 minutes or so washing pump parts. When I was home with M2, I would pump when needed (read: pump when my boobies felt like they were going to burst). Between feedings I had an oversupply of milk, so I pumped to relieve the pressure. I was able to stock pile milk in the freezer, and at one point I had amassed about 200 oz of breast milk. At the time I felt like it was a ton. It sounds like it, but in real terms a baby typically eats about 25-32 oz of milk per day in the first 6 months of life, so really it wasn't even a weeks worth of milk.
I quit freezing milk in mid-November when M2 began going to daycare. With going back to work and M2 spending her days in daycare, I found that I really only had the time and patience to pump once during the mid-day when we were apart. Basically my feeding/pumping routine started to look something like this:
Between 4-7 AM: M2 breastfeeds upon waking up hungry
Between 6-8 AM: Pump after feeding M2
Between 1-3 PM: mid-day pumping session
Between 7-8 PM: M2 breastfeeds
Around 10:30 PM: Pump
Between 11-12 PM M2 is fed thawed frozen breast milk or freshly pumped milk depending on daily pumping tally
During the day she eats about 3 bottles at daycare. Between my morning, mid-day and late night pumping session, I needed to collect about 16-18 oz total for her daycare bottles for the next day. The books all say that during the day, a working mom who is pumping should be pumping as often as she would feed her baby. For me that is every 3 hours, and really I don't have the time or patience to pump that often. I felt OK with pumping once during the mid-day knowing that I had the frozen breast milk to fall back on (and actually it is only good for 3 months in the freezer, so if I hadn't been using it I would have had to throw some out).
Last week I noticed that the supply in the freezer had dwindled, so I decided it was time to boost up the supply. Each day I packed up twice the supplies for pumping and added a pumping session to my day. What I found was that I ended up only getting about 2-3 oz more milk. In addition, it added 30 minutes to my day which kept me at work longer. I was discouraged and constantly feeling stressed that I wouldn't have enough milk for M2's daily needs. In addition I was starting to hate pumping even more. I had already resigned myself to pumping 3 times a day, I couldn't stomach adding a fourth and possible fifth session to the day. In the end I decided what I needed to do - supplement. I realized that I was doing a good job. I had busted my ass to make sure my baby had only breastmilk for her first 5 1/2 months of life.
So last night was the first formula feeding. I mixed the bottle up, feeling some apprehension and guilt. The mixture felt slightly sticky and had a funny smell to it (it kind of smelled like hay, whereas breast milk has kind of a sweet smell). I was creeped out by the powder wondering how it could possible nourish my child.... At 11:30 I pulled her out of her crib as usual and tucked a burp cloth under her neck as a bib. I popped the bottle nipple in her mouth and watched as she started to take in the warm milky looking liquid. In her half asleep state, she sucked it down just as she would a normal bottle of breast milk. Afterwards I burped her, and put her back to sleep in her crib.
Guess what? She slept in until 8:30 this morning. 9 hours between feedings...that is a record for her! She was her usual happy self this morning, so I can only assume she was unaffected by the change in her diet. It was a hard decision to decide to supplement with formula rather than work harder to increase my milk supply, or spend more time per day pumping. When it came down to it, I realized I would rather spend that extra half hour a day with M2 than stay at work to make up the time it takes to pump twice a day instead of once. I had thought it would be nice to be able to say "my child has only had breast milk" but really it doesn't matter. She went nearly 6 months exclusively eating breast milk, and she will still eat 25-30 oz of breast milk a day with only 4-6 oz of formula. On the weekends I plan to only breastfeed her and avoid pumping, bottles, and formula for those two days (the milk I pump on Friday will go towards her Monday bottles for daycare).
We've been feeding her a jar per night of baby food, and so far she is loving it. It's fun to see her try new foods and react to the new tastes. So far she seems to really like pears, apples, green beans, and peas.
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