I'll admit, my last post probably makes me look like a bad person, complaining about my friends kids. It was late at night and I was cranky when I wrote it so I do apologize for how harsh it sounds. However, I do feel very strongly about the issue of what is acceptable and not acceptable behavior when visiting other people's homes with your kids in tow. I don't expect friends kids to be on their best behavior at all times (I know my child has her moments when we're out and about), but I do think it is reasonable to expect parents to not only supervise their children, but train them to behave well when they are a guest somewhere. Children who run around wild with no rules or direct supervision by their parents, to me that is unacceptable. I don't blame the kids so much as I blame the parents.
We know people with toddlers and young children where the parents do watch their kids closely, and they do bring things to entertain them. If their child acts up, they discipline them and are consistent with their discipline. We know people who have trained their children to be polite and say please/thank you. It seems like a lot of children these days (the "Generation Z" kids) have grown up with few boundaries and the constant affirmations that they are "special" and that the world revolves around them. Just to reiterate - not all kids are this way, but it's been my observation that there are many kids who fall into this group.
I realize as a parent of a Generation Z child, it will take extra effort on my part to teach her the proper social etiquette when she will be going to school with many self-centered and technologically connected kids. It's easy to pick up on the behaviors of those around you, and I truly feel like our youth and society have lost many of the social graces of generations past (yes, this coming from a woman who once left a nastigram note on her neighbors car. Nobody's perfect!) That aside, in general I feel like technology has both helped and crippled society. It's helpful because we are so wired and connected, but at the same time our dependence on the internet and technology has also crippled us because of the amount of time these things consume in our day to day lives (think cell phones, facebook, video games, satillite TV). Also, technology has impacted the way people interact with one another face to face, and not necessarily in a good way. I'll admit, I love my iphone and all the wonderful things that it does. However, it is also a major distraction and while it helps me stay overly connected to my email, news, FB, etc, it also sucks up a lot of time.
I think one of the problems with behavior training children is that it is hard work. Really hard work. My cousin is in the process of teaching her 18 month old how to say please and thank you, putting her in timeout for bad behavior, and teaching her that whining and crying will not allow her to get her way. I saw how much effort it took her to constantly remind her child of these. It's exhausting and it will take a while for the behavior to be reinforced, but in the end it will be worth it. So while I still have a sweet, non-mobile, non-talking 6 month old, I am gearing myself up for behavior training next year. I know it will be hard work, and it would be a lot easier to hand her a flashy toy, a cell phone, a video game console, anything to keep her from whining and to allow me time to do whatever it is I want to do.... but I hope to stay strong and firm in teaching her how to behave, even if it requires the sacrifice of time. I don't want to become "that person" I complain about whose child runs wild at other people's homes...
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