Monday, April 4, 2011

How would YOU handle a stage 5 meltdown?

It can be tricky taking kids out. Now that I have two I kind of miss the days of how easy it was to get out with just one (taking two out requires twice as much prep work to get everyone ready and out the door, and in/out of the car). I've learned a few things about running errands with kids:

1. It's best to run errands in the morning, but not too late in the morning as not to impose on nap time.
2. Kids must be well rested and fed.
3. If they are showing signs of crankiness before leaving the house, it may be best to just stay home.
4. If there are multiple errands to run, prioritize them - it is rare that we make it to all the stores on the list.
5. Drive thru's are awesome. Sometimes I'll drive 5 miles out of my way to the drive thru Starbucks.

That being said, when you're out and one or both kids is melting down, it can be ugly. I've been in the situation where we were in a store and I just had to drop what I was planning to buy and hightail it out of the store. I can usually placate a little bit of whining with snacks or toys, but if a crying outburst occurs, it's best to abort the mission and exit stage right.

Recently I was at Baby Gap and there was a woman who walked in the store right after me. She had two little girls by her side, and a 6 monthish old boy in a front carrier. He was crying pretty hard when she walked into the store, which quickly turned to a stage 5 meltdown. Hysterical screams, shrieks, and red faced cries. It was as bad as it gets. People were staring. My kids, who are known to be "sympathy criers" both started to whimper. Did the lady leave the store? No. She kept on shopping acting like there wasn't a baby on the verge of spontaneous combustion against her chest. I tried to ignore it while I shopped, but it was hard to ignore. Finally I decided to check out and leave, so I got into line.

Who decides to get in line behind me? Yeah... after about 2 minutes of incessant wailing I turned around and gave the lady a look. It wasn't as harsh of a look as it would have been in my pre-child days (prior to having kids I may have given really dirty looks to parents of unruly children. I may have even made passive-aggressive comments on occasion within earshot of parents of really unruly children). Part of me can be sympathetic, but when people are acting blatantly opposite of how I would handle a situation, it's hard to feel sympathy. Had I been that lady I would have been out of the store within a minute of the kid reached the full on meltdown stage. I just wonder why this lady thought it was appropriate to stay in the store and shop. I know it can be frustrating to abort a shopping mission, but hey, there is always online shopping later to pick out the items you intended to buy at the store.

My question for you people (if anyone actually reads this thing?) What would you do in the situation that your child is having a stage 5 meltdown in public?

3 comments:

  1. I would do the same thing as you! Abort the mission and go back another time. I'm the type that hates to impose on people, so I would be very nervous and anxious to stay in the store. I know people would be staring at me and then I wouldn't be able to fully concentrate on the mission itself.
    Although the other argument of this is that it is a public place and children are people too, so we should deal with a crying/screaming child. Unfortunately, that is not my belief.

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  2. I would absolutely leave the store, and I know my mother would have done the same with all of us. It is not fair to the other shoppers, nor the baby, in my opinion.

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  3. I think it totally depends on the age of the child and the reason behind the melt down. I'm actually one of those people that doesn't mind listening to kid having meltdowns in stores, because I just get to smile and think, "glad I'm not them!" My attitude may change when I have my own. I would rather listen to a child crying or screaming than hear a parent yelling or talking harshly to a child. Nothing irks me more than a parent loosing thier cool in a store. I'm always very impressed with people that can ignore a tantrum and not let it ruin their day or have it dictate their day. Like I said it all depends on the age of the child and the reason for the melt down. We all have to deal with a lot of annoying things adults do, I would think having a little more grace for children would be in order.

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