Parenting advice from non-parents is like a tween telling an adult how to drive.

Every other year, my in laws come out to visit for Easter. This was an off year, so we spent the holiday having dinner with friends. They had invited other friends that we see a few times a year at the host's events. This one couple was there and proudly announcing that they're expecting their first child late in the fall (the woman made sure to emphasize that she was 7 weeks 4 days....I suppose I remember those times when every day of pregnancy seemed worth noting as the time passes so slowly, especially in the beginning).

This woman lists her occupation as "actress" though I gather that "stay at home wife" is a more accurate description of her day to day position. She is generally an amusing person to listen to as she is one of those very loud dramatic, confident and opinionated people that can light up the room. These attributes combined with her newly pregnant state, we all got to hear an earful of her parenting plans. She was saying these statements in front of three families, all who already have young kids. We were all polite enough to nod our heads and smile. She'll learn.

First she went into a diatribe about how she wants to use cloth diapers because they're better. Her husband chimed in that the real reason she wants to go cloth is not because of environmental reasons, but because she thinks cloth diapers are cuter (she rebutted by pointing out that disposables are laden with chemicals and why would she want chemicals touching her baby's skin all day long?) She also complained about how she has researched the world's safest infant car seat but it is only sold in Europe so she needs to figure out how to import one here without paying a fortune because obviously that car seat is far superior to any you can find here in North America.

The one that almost got me blowing wine out my nose was her statement that she plans to have her child completely potty trained before age one. Yes, one. As she put it, "I'll be home all day with the kid anyway, so it won't be hard to do elimination communication." Uh huh....I've read about EC, not a ton, but enough to know that it takes some serious work and commitment to make it happen. I almost feel like EC is like a unicorn...a mythical thing that may not really exist. None of us mother's at the dinner were bold enough to tell this woman that potty training an infant is going to be the least of her worries. Sleeping, eating, showering, household chores - all of these things become so much harder once you have a child. I have days where I am so busy tending to my kids needs that it takes me nearly an hour to get to the bathroom for a quick pee myself!

I am not really an "I told you so" kind of person, but I am curious to see in the coming years how all these things have worked out for this couple when they actual are in the trenches of parenthood. Maybe all those things will work out for them, and if so then good for them. I in no way think that what I've done is the best way or the only way, I just know that the choices I've made have been the best ones for my family and our situation - and I also recognize that many of the things we've done are opposite of what I thought I would do prior to having kids. I do think that parenting is a lot different when you're actually in it. I wish I could go back and stop myself from saying out loud to others some of the parenting ideas I had prior to having kids.